Words such as "respect" and "integrity" come up often when he talks about "Dancing," and he's become a big defender of the art form. While being interviewed by an "Entertainment Tonight" crew, he describes the dance he and Johnson just performed for the cameras: "It's called the cha-cha-cha. ... Many people erroneously say 'cha-cha.' That's an insult to every dancer."

So how did it come to this? How did one of entertainment's most twisted minds end up on one of TV's most earnest shows? Even he's not entirely sure. But Jillette says it didn't take any convincing.

"I didn't have to think about it at all," he says. "They said they were considering me, and I thought, 'Well, that's a good opportunity to get in better shape and lose weight.' "

Jillette, who's happy to say he's "lost the weight of my children," was running eight miles a day before Johnson arrived Feb. 16 and began their demanding, five-hour-a-day, seven-day-a-week rehearsals. It's a schedule that has overwhelmed much younger, lighter contestants.

"He's very dedicated. ... He's come along really, really well," Johnson says. "To be honest with you, when I found out how tall he was and how big he is, I was concerned that he'd be heavy on his feet and he wouldn't be able to move all that well. But I was pleasantly surprised."

He's come so far that the duo recently performed their taxing cha-cha-cha routine, walrus slide and all, 14 straight times without a break.

"It's very, very physical, and it's hard work," Jillette says of his training regimen. "But not supernatural, either." So it's not as draining as past contestants have made it seem? "Oh it's draining. It's hard," he says, and he does, in fact, sound drained. "But you don't want to ever complain when someone reading this might actually have a job."

Unlike some of his competition, Jillette won't even complain about "Dancing's" notoriously tacky costumes. "I'll do anything," he says. "If they want a tiara, I'm good."

Then again, he's never actually seen the show. He rarely watches TV at all. But he made his first appearances on "Late Night with David Letterman," "Saturday Night Live" and "The Howard Stern Show" without having seen or heard them.

And while he may not be all that familiar with "Dancing," he knows enough to go in with a few tricks up his shiny, ruffly, likely-to-be-covered-in-sequins sleeves. He's working on some magic for each routine, and he's teaching Johnson to juggle and, possibly, eat fire.

After the antics of her past partners -- Mark Cuban's "I Dream of Jeannie" dance, Joey Fatone's "Star Wars" routine, and pretty much everything Jerry Springer did -- you get the feeling that Johnson may have reached her limit.

"I'm not too keen on that yet," the Aussie bombshell says of the fire-eating. "I'm a little concerned. I'm all for, like, learning how to juggle. He can cut me in half. But when he said 'I want to teach you how to eat fire,' I thought there was some trick to it. But there's no trick. ... He said 'You'll burn your mouth a bit, but that's OK.' "

Johnson says she's considering it -- "He assures me my hair won't go on fire, or I won't have a Michael Jackson moment" -- which can only help Jillette, who figures he'll need all the help he can get to win over the judges and viewers. "I'm the oldest, the fattest and the tallest" contestant, he says. "None of that's good."

But he does have limited dance experience. He took dance classes and learned routines at clown college, and he opened each episode of FX's "Penn & Teller's Sin City Spectacular" with a dance number.

Jillette also is hoping he can draw upon his musical training. "I am a bass player. And with notable exceptions, perhaps Paul McCartney," he says, breaking into laughter, "bass players are supposed to know where the beats are."

But he gets serious again when discussing his underdog status that was cemented when a Wynn Las Vegas oddsmaker placed him at a 30-1 long shot to win "Dancing with the Stars."

"I think that 30-1 was a little bit pessimistic," he says. "If you had to ask me now, I would say I don't think I'll be the first off. I think I'll last a few weeks. It seems unlikely that I'd actually win, but I'm trying as hard as I can."

Getting real: Amanda P., a Las Vegas law student, is among the 25 women competing in "The Bachelor: London Calling" (10 p.m. today, KTNV-TV, Channel 13).

And in addition to some of her offstage life, Rita Rudner's 2,000th show was recorded for "Rita Rudner: Live from Las Vegas" (9 p.m. today, KLVX-TV, Channel 10). PBS says the show is the first comedy special it ever has aired.

Christopher Lawrence's Life on the Couch column appears on Mondays. E-mail him at clawrence@reviewjournal.com.