So what's behind the rash of TV-friendly local chefs?

"It's an extraordinary place to be," Ramsay says of the city. "And when you think of every top chef is there in Vegas, that makes it an even more competitive market.

"Every top chef in the world is there, so of course you're going to produce talent."

This season's talent consists of Jason Underwood, a sous chef at Capo's Italian Cuisine; Louross Edralin, who runs a kitchen at the Ritz-Carlton, Lake Las Vegas; and Sharon Stewart, a room service chef at what she'll only say is "one of the major hotels on the Strip."

And, for better or worse, all three make early, and lasting, first impressions.

When Stewart struggles during the first challenge, one of her teammates dismisses her as "Barbie" -- "because she's blond with big knockers" -- and Ramsay tells her to "go put some more makeup on."

And throughout the first episode, Underwood and Edralin function as the show's Goofus and Gallant: Whereas Underwood is constantly berated by Ramsay and wanders off during the first cooking challenge to smoke and (shudder!) rub his bare feet, Edralin steps up to offer the men's team some much-needed leadership.

Despite being singled out, Stewart says she wasn't wearing any more makeup than usual. "It wasn't intentional to stand out," she says, even though the bright blue eye shadow makes her easier to keep track of in the crowded kitchen. "... That's really how I am."

For his part, Underwood swears he doesn't remember his disappearing act and truly seems baffled. "That must have been some kind of editing trick or something," he says. "I don't know." Although he eventually admits, "That sounds like something I'd do."

All three say they're fans of the show and knew what to expect from the volatile Ramsay, who's become famous for hurling both insults and plates of food. Or at least they thought they did.

"It's funny to sit home and watch," Underwood says. "It's not funny when that man's standing over you throwing (expletive) at you."

The laid-back Edralin considered it almost an honor to be insulted by the Simon Cowell of the kitchen. "It's like receiving your merit badge as a Boy Scout," he says. "He calls you a donkey, and I'm, like, 'That's my donkey patch.' "

But the others didn't take it quite as well.

"You know, when he's hard on you, some of those things stick into your head," Stewart says, "and you start to question yourself."

And Underwood, who has a certain Paul Giamatti quality when he's venting, still vividly recalls two insults. "He called me Shrek and a fat (expletive). That kind of bothered me. And actually fat (expletive) wasn't even that bad. Shrek kinda pissed me off."

But surely he had some good experiences on the show. Maybe a brief moment of praise from Ramsay?

"No. No. He's not nice," Underwood says, before tossing a couple of unprintable anatomical insults the chef's way. "... He's so mean. He is. He's so rotten."

Although to be fair, Underwood, one of the most perfect reality show contestants to come along in awhile, doesn't seem to get along with much of anybody.

"I'll be damned if I'm gonna lose to a team of girls," he says in Tuesday's premiere. "The only thing I'm going to lose to a woman is, like, an ironing contest."

On the phone, he's proud of his admitted sexism. "I don't think women are credible in a kitchen whatsoever," he says. "So, I do kind of look down on 'em." (And, yes, it takes a few minutes to wrap your head around someone being a sexist by saying women don't belong in the kitchen.)

While they may not have gotten along with each other, all three talk about their experiences as though they just staggered, bloody and dehydrated, out of captivity at the end of "Saw XVIII."

But unlike Underwood, Stewart and Edralin are able to remember the (semi)sweet along with the bitter.

"It was definitely an experience," she says. "I don't know if 'fun' would be the word, or 'hell' would be the word, or somewhere in between."

"Yeah, 'Hell's Kitchen' was hell," Edralin adds. "But at the same time, there was a little bit of heaven to it."

Christopher Lawrence's Life on the Couch column appears on Mondays. E-mail him at clawrence@reviewjournal.com.