It was the "Naked Teen Voyeur Bus."

Radio's Opie and Anthony told him, "You can stay here, or you can get into this bus with topless teenage girls."

The bus ran afoul of then-Mayor Rudy Giuliani, the cross-dressing moralist. But Black says this was not illegal:

"It's not against the law in the state of New York for women to go topless."

So there you go. If women can disrobe publicly in New York, how can Vegas strippers not also market their assets?

Speaking of toplessness, Black has autographed a handful of female fans' breasts in his career, on their request.

"Usually, their boyfriend is standing next to them. You wonder what he's thinking: 'Really? I've got to go home and look at her breasts with his name on it?'"

Black performs 10 p.m. today and Saturday ($80.90-$102.90; 792-7777).

THE WEEKEND'S BIG FIGHT

UFC bruiser Forrest Griffin on his past: "I started out as a nursing major."

That's part of what he tells me in today's Neon section. He also talks about leaving the ring early during his last fight, and how he's planning to retire.

He fights Tito Ortiz again Saturday at Mandalay Bay ($100-$1,000).

Lewis Black says he can't handle the mixed martial arts brutality of the UFC.

"It's a little more than I can bear," Black says. "If you go back to the early Romans and the lions, they'd be the guys beating the (stuff) out of each other."

TO ALL THE GIRLS HE'S LOVED BEFORE

Julio Iglesias sings tonight and Saturday at the Las Vegas Hilton ($69.91-$102.91).

Black can't imagine there's a crossover fan who likes all three acts: the UFC, Black's comedy and Julio Iglesias. If there is such a fan?

"It's probably a woman in her late 70s who's really angry."

As for Black's comedy, he's debating whether to joke about Sarah Palin.

"As a comic, she's a gold mine," he says. But, "I think enough's enough."

He would like to see strippers in the boxes. "I'll look for that strippermobile."

But he won't ride with strippers again. "Thank God, I've established myself enough I don't need to go out with topless teenage girls, anymore."

Doug Elfman's column appears on Sundays, Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays. E-mail delfman@reviewjournal.com. He also blogs at reviewjournal.com/elfman.